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Post by Misha Charisse Quinn on Sept 26, 2018 17:02:09 GMT
[OOC: takes place after Misha's thread with Peyton, "À mi-chemin"] Misha was thankful when her hand found the handle of a door; a classroom, if Peyton was right. She was getting really tired of groping her way around in the dark, and she opened the door confidently. Or she would have, if someone else hadn't already yanked it open, the strength of the motion forcing her forward, and, positioning her other hand first. to break her fall, instinctively closing her eyes and preparing herself for the hit. She was tired of stumbling over everything like a clumsy kitten, honestly. To her surprise, the shock was much softer than she expected, considering that what she met wasn't the cold hard ground but her best friend's very confused form.
–hm? Oh, it's you. – Properly registering her situation, she took a step back, raising her eyes towards the man. – What are you...
Her voice caught in her throat at the sight, not of her friend, but of something behind him. Something much worse. She gulped.
– Alex... - though she tried, her eyes couldn't leave her discovery. – ... Why the hell are you in here?
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Post by Alexander Attiyah on Sept 26, 2018 21:15:02 GMT
Alex waited for a little longer inside the room after Peyton had left, still muttering quiet prayers under his breath. For Em. For Jamie. For Zak. For any of the others that could have died in that very room he was in or throughout the school. His body felt frozen, save for the occasional shivers that would hit him every so often - the kind that you get from cold uneasiness gripping at your mind. He hated this room (and all the smells and experiences attached to it), but it wasn't even the main reason for him shivering right now.
"God help us," he whispered as a final prayer under his breath while the grip on his arms tightened. A heavy sigh escaped his lips while the cold of the room mingled with the thoughts in his head. If what Peyton had said was true--and he honestly had no reason to believe she wasn't as he had worried about the same thing--then his fears of others being possessed and wandering around the school torturing and killing people was being realized. And at a far bigger danger than even Amanda had been: a thought which was extremely nerving for the ravenhaired.
Sitting there in that room, having experienced the terror--the horror--of everything his old classmate had done to them... It was hard enough as it was. Traumatizing enough. Even more so now that he was left alone with his thoughts and memories. What he had went through was no fucking joke. And if Naya is supposedly a bigger threat than even Amanda was, he went on to think as his body shook slightly at the thought, his hands tightening, then what kind of horrors are we going to have to face next?
He didn't know. Nor did he dare want to think about the possibilities. All he knew was that it fueled his desire to burn that bastard controlling and torturing everyone into the fucking ground even more. Both for revenge for taking his sister and Jamie away from him as well as so many others he knew, as well as to prevent the rest of those he cared about from meeting similar fates.
They needed to get out. Now more than ever.
Shaking his head in firm resolve and grief, Alex let out a frustrated groan as he stood up and wandered in the same direction he had remembered coming in from, being careful not to bump into anything - worse being a particular (and extremely nauseating) body he still had no idea where it was. He didn't like being here in this room alone. And while it had been easier with Peyton there and he was getting slightly better at numbing the memories enough to handle standing there amid the evidence he had absolutely no doubt was there, it only made him uneasy now that he was by himself.
Thankfully, it didn't take him too long to get to the door, much to the ravenhaired's relief. And as he searched for the handle, he was too nervous and on edge from the room to notice the faint sounds of someone else on the other side of the door doing the exact same thing he was. And as he turned the handle and moved to open the door, it suddenly swung open in his direction, causing him to inhale a sharp breath while his heart seemed to all but stop inside his chest.
Even more so when he felt something knock into him, forcing him to take a small step back in shock.
"Woah!" Alex exclaimed as his arms immediately rose to catch--or fend off--whatever had hit him, confusion etched across his face. In his arms and leaning against his chest, he could feel something warm and soft holding onto him, like a person. And he realized his hands were now currently holding onto someone's arms, their warm breath hitting gently against the lower part of his neck as he heard a familiar--and equally surprised--voice meet his ears, causing his brief feeling of fear at the unknown 'attacker' to vanish in an instant.
"Oh, it's you," he heard Misha say, causing his confused expression to relax into a teasing smirk instead as relief coursed through him.
"Nice to run into you too, Cha-cha," he teased back as he felt her take a step back from him, his mood lifted slightly just by having her company with him again. Though the joking tone in his voice was still half-hearted due to his previous thoughts as well as where exactly he was right now. Something - it seemed - his best friend was concerned about, too, as she began to ask him about it.
However, she cut herself off mid-sentence, her voice sounding as tense as the air around them felt. "Alex," she whispered quietly and anxiously, causing his own smile to fade away. "Why the hell are you in here?"
"Trust me, it's not exactly my first choice for a hang out spot," he replied in a short and pointed tone as he instinctively turned his head to the side towards where the smell was coming from, guessing as to her thoughts while his brows creased together in regret. "I was talking to Peyton earlier. But after she left, I stayed behind for a little bit... Got uh- caught up in past experiences, I guess."
He paused for a moment to swallow hard as the heavy atmosphere still settled around them, his lips then parting slightly in an expression of bitterness and grief. He didn't want her to have to see whatever it was inside there, even more so when he knew what the others' reactions had been the last time he was in that room with Becca, Chris, and Max. He still didn't know exactly what everyone had seen but the smell of rotting flesh was enough of a statement for him to know he didn't want to know. And he gestured with his head past the redhead towards where she had just entered from, suggesting they leave instead; he didn't want to be in that room anymore either. And while he was sure she had already seen... well, whatever horrors were left behind in there, he didn't want her having to see them longer than she had to.
"What about you?" he asked her after a moment as he left the door slowly close behind him, his eyebrow raised slightly in concerned curiosity while he tried to change the subject. "You okay? Gotta say though, that was some graceful entrance. First I meet you tripping over a rock, and now you nearly take me out. Sounds like you're two-for-two today." He chuckled a little under his breath to help lift the mood, though on his face, his smile still remained an honest, rather apologetic expression.
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Post by Misha Charisse Quinn on Sept 27, 2018 7:10:26 GMT
Her eyes darted back from Alex to the rotting corpse behind him. It was hard to reciprocate his good spirit when she had this kind of spectacle in front of her, so she simply let him speak. She didn’t know what was worse, this horrible sight put on display, or the fact that it barely shocked her as much as it should have. This place was doing things to her, and it was starting to worry her. She shouldn’t be able to glance at this with barely a reaction. She wondered if Alex even knew it was there; but despite not being able to see… it should be impossible for him not to smell it. She wondered if there were many others around the school. She wondered who it was, too, but she refused to look at it long enough to figure it out. She was more than relieved when Alex gestured for them to get out, and she followed without a sound, content to see the door close behind them. Its revolting odor was almost gone now. Losing sight of it must have helped her mood a little, for she smiled at Alex’ joke. Of course he would have fun at her expense in a situation like this. If not at the worse of times, when?
– What can I say. I am a creature of elegance. – she shrugged – Unlike you, who is a creature of filth. – her hand rose naturally to his forehead, caressing the marks of blood had hardened. She wasn’t sure whether to hope it wasn’t his blood, or whether to pray it was his own. – How did you get that? – she asked, almost afraid of the answer. Yet, another question was on her mind. – … … what… “experiences” were you caught up in?
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Post by Alexander Attiyah on Sept 27, 2018 17:21:39 GMT
Following Misha's teasing words back, Alex instantly felt an honest smile pull at the corners of his lips, his nerves easing a little bit more. "Hey, I'll take that as a compliment," he laughed in reply as he felt her arm lightly brush against his, grateful that they didn't have to be in that room any longer. Especially since she was starting to sound less anxious herself.
Though as he moved to tease her again, he was halted in his thoughts when he felt Misha's body lean a little closer towards him, the distance between them narrowing. Immediately he could feel his heart skip a little beat, and as he slowly felt her warm fingers start to caress his forehead, he couldn't help but be more aware of where she was in regards to him, his breath caught in his throat while his chest seemed to warm as well.
"How did you get that?" he heard her ask quietly in a rather concerned voice while her fingers carefully brushed along his skin, as if indicating what it was she was questioning him about.
"Get what?" he asked honestly as his lips parted slowly, her question pulling him a little from his thoughts as his body continued focusing on the tender way she traced his skin. His brows knit together into a somewhat confused look; he wasn't quite following what exactly it was that she was looking at. In truth, he probably had way too many cuts and bruises on his body to even be aware of them all, and besides the bruising on his nose, he wasn't sure what else she could be talking about. Though it sounded like something that worried her, and he instinctively shifted a little to allow his arm to come up where hers was, trading his own hand with hers.
Running his fingers along his skin where she had been, Alex instantly felt a dried substance on his face like a thin coating of liquid. What is that? Blood? he thought as his eyebrows rose slightly in surprise. Following the differing texture, he eventually felt a small line like a tiny ridge running along the upper left part of his face brush underneath his fingertips, indicating the source. The cut wasn't very long and it had already clotted over and begun to heal, but he could immediately tell what it was and in the back of his mind, he vaguely remembered a stinging pain that had flared up in that same spot after he had been knocked backward from running into that wall.
"Oh. Yeah, I think I must have grazed a nail or something earlier by accident," he explained with a sheepish chuckle as he lowered his hand back down towards his side, shaking his head a little in added assurance. "It's fine, though - it doesn't hurt."
Letting out a quiet breath, he sent a reassuring smile in her direction and focused on the warmth from her hand on his skin, hoping she wouldn't be too worried about it. He didn't think it could be that bad if he wasn't even aware it was there. But he was pulled from his thoughts a second time by her next question, her voice sounding hesitant as she quietly breathed out the words.
A guilty expression flicked on his face for a split second at her question, though he remained calm as his lips slowly parted to answer her. "I was thinking about the event where I lost my sight," he confessed after a moment as he let out a quiet breath, his smile fading a little. "About what happened in there..." As he spoke, he leaned his head back slightly where the door was in indication, letting her piece what he was saying together as he continued. "It's hard not to think about, I guess. And with what Drei said earlier - with Amanda - and how she's sorry for what she did? To be honest, I don't want to forgive her. And I don't think I can either."
Alex paused for a minute, a bitter expression evident on his face as he bit the inside of his cheek. He had heard too much, experienced too much. The pain was still extremely real for him, and no sorry was going to bring those she killed back... or his sight either. And as if affected by that thought, the ravenhaired shifted his head a little to the side away from where Misha was, not wanting her to see his face... to see the burnt scars Amanda had caused...
"But there's something else too," he went on to add, his voice hesitant as he spoke. "Peyton said that the same bastard that's been controlling all of this took over Naya's body. It made her like Amanda... She's...she's the one that killed Emery."
As he spoke, his voice became more and more hushed while the pain seemed to seep into his tone even more. His words were barely audible save for how silent the hallway was - so silent it was almost eerie in a way. Though the topic of conversation seemed to heighten that sensation as his lips formed into a grim line. "Whatever this fucking thing is, it's getting stronger. And-" he paused, biting his lip slightly as a mixed expression of fear and concern and anger formed on his face. "-I'm worried, Misha. If things were that bad with Amanda, how much worse are they gonna be now?"
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Post by Misha Charisse Quinn on Sept 29, 2018 10:54:33 GMT
The look Alex directed her seemed to indicate he had no idea what she was even talking about, and it took him quite a few minutes of feeling his own forehead and pondering before he could come up with a reasonable explanation. Despite this, Misha frowned, eyeing him carefully for any traces of lies or half-truths. She wasn’t sure how much she trusted him when he spoke about his own wellbeing anymore, considering how well it’d gone the last time; but now she could actually see his face, and this made things much easier. She wondered if he even realized how much more vulnerable and open he was now that he was blind; as if he had to learn how to lie all over again. Made things easier for her. Yet, her attention was quickly directed away from this when Alex finally confessed to what had been on his mind, instantly causing her to wince slightly. Her eyes darted up towards his scars; despite how much she forced herself to still look at him in the face and get used to the sight, she still inwardly avoided having to look at the wounds directly. She was happy he couldn’t see her do it… though overall, she would be happier if he could see anything. Even her avoidance. She stopped herself from lowering her hand from his forehead to the burnt skin around his eyes, and simple slid it into the boy’s hand, squeezing it gently. – I don’t think I can forgive her either. – she whispered. She was close enough for him to hear every intonation of her voice, how angry, tense yet deeply hurt she felt. – Not after what she’s done to everybody. – she paused. Her grip on his hand tightened. – To you. It’s just so…. Easy to ask for forgiveness when it’s too late, you know? Do you think she would still be sorry if she didn’t end… the way she did?She doubted it. Honestly. She wasn’t the type to hold a grudge, but… there were limits not to cross. Satanism was one she’d never thought she’d have to consider.
"But there's something else too," her friend interrupted her thoughts, causing her to raise her head and gaze into his empty eyes. "Peyton said that the same bastard that's been controlling all of this took over Naya's body. It made her like Amanda... She's...she's the one that killed Emery." – Naya? – the question came out as a hushed murmur. Naya… she was Emery’s best friend. She and Peyton both. She didn’t know why would Amanda ever want to hurt any of them; but why would Naya’s first victim be… one of the people she loved the most? She looked down at the floor as confused, horrified thoughts crossed her mind, each more puzzling than the last. As she did, Alex continued talking, sounding as perplexed as she felt, his words hesitant. "Whatever this fucking thing is, it's getting stronger. And…I'm worried, Misha. If things were that bad with Amanda, how much worse are they gonna be now?" It took a while for her to voice out her biggest question. Time, and courage.
– … do you think… Naya was always fucked up too? – she gulped. She didn’t know how close Alex and her were, but… she knew how close she had been. – I mean… Amanda… the pictures, the weed, she did all this before we got down here. And we don’t know for certain for how long this… thing has been happening, if it really is a demon, for how long he’s been controlling her. So does it just… go after her crazy girls with soft exteriors? Like Naya? – she opened her mouth, closed it again. She wasn’t even sure how to properly explain her doubts. How to share them. – It’s just… she was so quick to obey the phone texts when they told her to grope me. And Peyton said she had been acting strange a while ago, way before Amanda fell to her doom, and she was already… affecting Emery. So do you think she’s just… always been like this, deep down, and we never figured it out until now?
It was so hard to even fathom. So difficult to accept. Naya and her had their ups and downs, but she never saw her as a confused, scared young girl in need of reassurance, support, and attention. Not this weird, terrifying monster that went after her fellow classmates one by one, starting with her best friend. And despite it all, she couldn’t help but feel… played. Manipulated. She would have vouched for her not so long ago. And now… she was putting them all in danger? For games? What if this hadn’t even been her first killing? If Peyton’s suspicions were true, how to know which had been responsible for Jamie’s slow, agonizing death? She shook her head. This was too much to handle, even for her.
Giving Alex a look, she gently squeezed his hand once more, pulling at him to let him know she wanted him to follow her. – Come. – her voice sounded soft, but the kind of soft you have when you don’t have much else to give. – Let’s get you cleaned up. There’s a bathroom not far from here.
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Post by Alexander Attiyah on Sept 29, 2018 20:26:07 GMT
Alex felt Misha's hand slowly leave his forehead as he turned his head away, the cold of the hallway now replacing the previous warmth from her fingertips. He wasn't quite sure what she was thinking right now, and without being able to see her face, it made it a little harder for him to guess. In some ways, he wasn't entirely sure if he wanted to know... Though he soon felt her hand slide into his, the simple and warm touch softening his bitter expression the smallest bit as he held her hand back.
"I don't think I can forgive her either," he heard her admit quietly as her fingers gently squeezed his own, causing him to turn his head slightly towards her again. "Not after what she's done to everybody. To you." Her voice carried a bitter, deeply hurt tone to it as she spoke - one that instantly made the ravenhaired's heart hurt. He knew and understood the emotions so evident in every word she breathed out, and as she whispered that last sentence, he could feel his chest tighten in response, much like her grip on his hand was. "It's just so... Easy to ask for forgiveness when it's too late, you know?"
"After hearing about all that stuff she asked Drei to do even before the earthquake, I honestly don't know anymore," he replied truthfully after letting out a quiet breath, his head shaking slowly. "I thought I had a vague idea of who Amanda was before, and now I feel like I'm forced to question everything. Even Drei..."
Groaning a little in frustration, Alex raised his free hand towards his hair, running his fingers through the strands in a visually troubled manner. He didn't blame Drei. But he would also be lying to say he wasn't disappointed in the guy. Or himself for that matter, for not seeing any of this earlier. Some friend you are, he muttered inwardly at himself while he lowered his hand back down towards his side, his grip on Misha's tightening slightly as he continued to clue her in on Naya: one more friend who wasn't entirely who he once thought they were... Fuck.
He remained quiet as the echoed sound of his voice--filled with every feeling of fear, concern, and anger--that had once filled the hallway now died into a solemn silence, the atmosphere around them feeling as heavy as he felt. Beside him, he could hear Misha's quiet breath as they stood there together, still holding each other's hands gently. But while neither one of them dared to say anything for a while, inside his head his own thoughts were racing. And it seemed like the same could be said for his best friend as well as she broke the silence, her voice quiet and hesitant.
"Do you think... Naya was always fucked up too?" he heard her ask, the seriousness of the question settling around the two of them. And as she continued to explain her thinking, he couldn't help but toss that question around in his head, his lips a thin line of concern and thought.
"I don't know," he whispered honestly after she had asked her final question, the weight of her words and the subject feeling heavy against his chest. His voice was quiet and calm, yet he couldn't disguise the uncertainty and concern in his tone as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze. Thinking back, he had never known Naya to be someone to be concerned about; a little too emotional for his personal comfort sometimes (he never really knew what to do when people started crying) but not someone he would ever consider to be dangerous or someone he or others should avoid.
Yet he couldn't help but wonder... couldn't help but mull over the possibility that there was something he hadn't seen. Something that happened far before the earthquake and before they ever knew of their invisible tormentor. It was a hard thing to believe, for sure. But he couldn't exactly deny it outright. He hadn't been aware of Amanda. Hadn't even been aware of Drei... What if I was wrong about other people too?
He had no doubts about what Peyton had said; that this place had gotten to Naya and the girl they were once friends with was now gone. But when did this all start was the question he didn't know. Had there been things that happened even before the earthquake that he didn't see? Like with Amanda? Or had she been manipulated because of this place? Like Emery...
Maybe they all had skeletons in their closets they weren't aware of. Ones not even close friends knew about.
Continuing to stand there in silence for a few seconds more as he mulled over his thoughts, Alex soon felt the warmth of Misha's hand slowly start tugging towards where she was standing beside him, indicating him to move. "Come," she directed him softly, her voice sounding as exhausted and tired as he felt. "Let's get you cleaned up. There's a bathroom not far from here."
Giving her a small smile in agreement, he let her lead him down the hallway, too tired to argue or tease her about how he felt fine and would probably just get dirtied up again anyway. He knew it was safer anyway to have his cut cleaned. And besides... he didn't exactly mind the thought either... nor having her help as he continued to hold her hand gently in his, clinging to her warmth as the two of them both made their way in the dark.
It wasn't the most graceful trek in history as even Misha was having a hard time seeing without lights from any of their phones, and he almost found it amusing that it was a "blind leading the blind" scenario. Quite literally. However it didn't take them long until they eventually wound up inside the bathroom, the sound of the door closing behind them as Misha led him further inside the room. And much to the ravenhaired's relief, there was a lot less glass on the floor than he remembered. Thank God!
"Be careful of the glass in here," Alex warned softly as they walked forward, his fingers gently tightening around her hand. And soon they came to a stop, a hard object suddenly nudging him a little in the hip as he shifted. Lifting his hand towards the unknown culprit, he felt along the edge of it to realize it was one of the sinks, and he allowed his body to lean into it, helping him situate where he was visually in the room.
Raising his head towards where he could sense Misha was as he concentrated on her, he could feel how tense the two of them were from before and his lips slowly spread into a soft smile, his eyes blindingly looking ahead. "When I thought about sneaking into the men's bathroom with a girl," he teased slowly, his voice carrying a somewhat playful tone to it as his lips turned upwards into a hint of a smirk, "I don't think this is exactly the scenario I had in mind."
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Post by Misha Charisse Quinn on Sept 30, 2018 1:16:30 GMT
"After hearing about all that stuff she asked Drei to do even before the earthquake, I honestly don't know anymore, I thought I had a vague idea of who Amanda was before, and now I feel like I'm forced to question everything. Even Drei..."She shrugged in annoyance, before mentally cursing herself. This kind of gestures, as eloquent as they were, remained useless when her friend couldn’t see them. But the truth was… she truly didn’t want to have to acknowledge that out loud. Because she too was confused and perplexed by all of those discoveries of gentle-looking people secretly turning out to be pervs and serial killers. But most importantly, she was deeply hurt by Andrei’s actions; even if he was the least evil of the bunch, he was the one she trusted the most, and now… now she wasn’t so sure anymore. And Alex bringing him up again did not help. So, instead of looks or words, she squeezed his hand tightly. This seemed to be their best way to communicate when their voices couldn’t say what was needed. As they entered the bathroom, she smiled softly.
– Don’t worry, I’ve been here before. T’was good to have a drink for once. – she smiled softly when she saw him bump into a sink and reposition himself. – And I see you’ve found the source, so go ahead. Allowing him to manage himself, knowing surely he could do that much without her help, she turned around, admiring the view. The restroom was in a disastrous state, and surprisingly, it had nothing to do with what you’d usually expect to see in a bathroom: two mirrors out of three had been shattered, broken pieces discarded on the ground with the rest of the debris. As for the room overall, well, it didn’t really look that much better; thankfully, she managed to find some appropriately not-disgusting paper towels; bringing her treasure back with her, she handed it to her friend. – Here. – she rested her hand on the side of Alex’s arm for him to know where to grab it. Yet, she retrieved it last minute. Alex couldn’t see where his smudges were. – Uh… – she raised a hand to indicate where to aim for, but they both looked so much like shit that it would be hard to get in one go. Finally, after a few seconds of hesitation, she sighed. – Okay, you know what, nevermind.
Going around him just enough to access the sink, she opened the tap to let the water flow, soaking just enough of the towel in for it to be wet and usable without destroying it. Pleased, she slowly moved back in front of him. – What did you say again about me treating you like a giant toddler? – she teased. Her words reached him at the same time as her touch, and she gently pressed the fabric against his forehead. The rest she could enjoy watching him fail to take care of later, but that big wound on her forehead worried her. The last thing they needed now was infections. As she moved her hand, trying to get as much of it cleaned up without hurting him, her finger accidentally brushed against the lower part of his face. Just where his scars were. She winced. – Sorry… – she immediately moved her finger away; yet the unsettling sensation of his flesh against her remained. It felt so different from normal skin… … – … did it hurt?
"When I thought about sneaking into the men's bathroom with a girl," Alex’ voice reached her after some more time, his voice carrying such teasing she had to lower her eyes to take a good look at his face. His smug face. "I don't think this is exactly the scenario I had in mind."She laughed. – Somehow it’s never made its way into my personal fantasies either. – she joked back, her hands moving softly over his bruised skin again. Yet, and despite her dedication to her work, the smirk remained. – So tell me, what scenarios DID you have in mind? – she chuckled softly at the thought. She could only imagine… – Don’t worry. – she warned with a small chuckle – I’ve seen Andrei’s porn collection. Nothing you’ll say can scare me.
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Post by Alexander Attiyah on Oct 1, 2018 4:05:17 GMT
Alex's lips tilted upwards into a smirk as Misha gave him a chance to drink, and without waiting for much more of an invitation than that, he immediately turned his attention towards the sink and felt around for the handle. He didn't know how long they had all been stuck in this hell and devoid of food and water, but it was definitely more than just a few days. And words couldn't even describe how honestly parched he was. Thankfully he didn't have to wait much longer for as soon as he turned the faucet handle, he was met with the welcoming sound of water running and his lips broke into a grin, a look of relief etched across his face. "Thank God," he muttered under his breath as he instantly cupped his hands together and let the cold stream of liquid hit against his palms before bringing it up towards his mouth. His hands were probably filthy, but that was the least of his concerns as he concentrated on the way the water felt as it slipped down his throat, quenching his thirst. As he took sip after sip, some of the water escaped his fingers and washed over parts of his face, though he didn't mind in the slightest; he liked feeling the sensation of water on his skin again. And while listening to the rain was one thing--and one that was becoming so fucking mundane, he was honestly sick of the sound by now--it was an entirely different thing to actually have water hit against his cheeks. It was refreshing in every sense of the word, and he took a short moment to enjoy the moment as all his senses focused on the sweet relief. "Can't believe I almost forgot what that tasted like," he joked as he let out a satisfied gasp of air after taking his last sip, his lips automatically turning upwards into another grin. Cupping his hands one final time, he quickly doused his face to help wash away some of the dirt and sweat and turned the faucet off, allowing the water to drip down into the sink as he gave himself a few seconds to breathe again. Meanwhile, the sound of Misha's footsteps approached his side, and he turned his head towards the source of the noise, his expression softening. "Here," he heard her say gently, followed soon by her pressing something papery against his arm. Raising a curious eyebrow towards the unknown object, Alex shifted an arm over to try and grab it. Except as his fingers brushed against what he could only guess was a paper towel from her, it just as quickly vanished with a small burst of wind against his skin where it had been, causing the ravenhaired's eyes to widen slightly and his hand that had nearly latched onto the object to freeze in place as he gave the culprit a curious and somewhat amused look.
"Come on, I'm not gonna cut myself on it," he commented in a teasing tone as he playfully scrunched his nose up, his slightly wet bangs tickling the skin just above his eyes. Finding her hand holding the towel, Alex gave her a pointed smirk and teasingly flicked some of the water still on his wet hands in the direction he could hear her. Then, bringing the papery object towards his face, he dabbed at the area to dry off the remaining water droplets from when he had washed it merely seconds ago. Though while that particular job wasn't exactly difficult as he didn't have to see in order to do that, cleaning off the blood stains he had felt earlier (and probably a good amount of dirt and smudges he was damn sure he'd collected all over his face too), proved to be an entirely different matter. And one that Misha seemed to be unimpressed by, much to the ravenhaired's amusement. "Uh," she protested as he attempted to lightly rub the paper towel along his forehead where the cut was - apparently unsuccessfully judging by the hesitant tone in her voice. And he instantly paused in his movement, his expression somewhat lost as he adjusted his hand a little to the left and began rubbing at the new area for a few seconds. "How about now?" he asked as he lowered his hand and paused for a second time, an expectant look on his face. At her silence, however, he adjusted his hand again and wiped a little more, determined to do a better job. And as soon as he finished, he mirrored the same expression as he raised an eyebrow in added indication. "There?" he asked again, hoping he'd at least have gotten it by this point.
Yet his hopes were dashed when the paper towel suddenly left his hands, causing him to let out a humored "hey!" as a familiar, exasperated sigh met his ears from directly in front of him. "Okay, you know what, nevermind," Misha muttered before Alex felt her body nudge against his arm as she moved around him, the tone in her voice causing him to let out a quiet chuckle in response. Leaning against the sink, he could hear the sound of water running suddenly echo from behind him, the quiet noise reverberating slightly around them from within the small space. And as he listened, he found his thoughts start to wander a little, his smile fading for a moment. Truthfully, he didn't like having to rely on someone else for something as simple as cleaning his face. He liked being independent and self-sufficient. And a part of him--despite his jokes and teasing--couldn't help but feel a little frustrated. It was kind of ironic, actually, how he had become so used to doing things on his own already that meeting new challenges (even small ones like this) was like rediscovering the depth of what his injury meant. Walking was still a challenge. He couldn't read anything like that paper Peyton tried showing their group. He couldn't even see his best friend looking all frustrated at him anymore or read what she was thinking just by observing her face like he used to... And he missed it. He really missed it.
Yet despite all of that, he couldn't help the smile that was subconsciously pulling at the corners of his lips as Misha moved back in front of him, his expression immediately softening as he felt her hand brush lightly against his forehead before being replaced by a soft, wet fabric. "What did you say again about me treating you like a giant toddler?" he heard her tease as she began gently rubbing at the area around his cut, her pointed comment instantly causing his soft smile to spread into a playful grin.
"Hey, I think I was doing pretty good on my own," he teasingly protested as he tilted his head slightly to give her a better angle, his frustration quickly fading away with each careful stroke she made against his skin. Focusing on the warmth of her hand contrasting with the cool texture of the paper towel, Alex remained still and quiet as she moved from his forehead down the side of his face, working at whatever smudges he couldn't see. Though as she neared closer towards his eyes, he suddenly felt one of her fingers brush along the lower part of his scarred skin where the blindfold had once been and immediately her hand pulled away, causing his own breath to hitch in his throat as a surprised--and almost pained--expression flickered across his face. "Sorry," he heard her whisper under her breath, the room growing quiet for a second before her voice broke the silence again. "...Did it hurt?" "It did once," he replied gently as his mouth lowered into a small frown, his own voice hushed in the small echoing space as his mind wandered back in time for a moment. "Was the worst pain I've ever felt in my life... physically anyway. But that was a while ago. I'm fine now. Remember?" He gave her a small smile of reassurance, hoping to ease her worries a little. Though he wasn't sure how well he was doing that.
'While' was a subjective term here. None of them knew how long they had been trapped, yet he was sure it had only been a few days despite how it had felt like ages ago. But more than that, he couldn't hide his emotions as well as he used to from her; especially not right now when there were so many overwhelming things on his mind. And while he kind of liked being this open with her, the skin where her warm finger had brushed against him seemed to tingle as if on replay, going over the sensation of her touching his scars... and more prominently, how she had reacted to it. And despite guessing that she hadn't want to hurt him, he still felt rather self-conscious about it. However, he didn't want to dwell on it; not with them being as tense as they already were. And as he attempted to brighten the atmosphere, he immediately grinned as Misha's mood seemed to lift as well, her bright laugh echoing throughout the room and causing his chest to immediately warm. "Somehow it's never made its way into my personal fantasies either," she joked back as the cool temperature of the wet paper towel returned to his skin, their laughter mingling together for a moment as he allowed her to continue treating his injury. Though at her next question, he immediately felt his cheeks heat up ever so slightly before he could stop it, and he shook his head a little, a playful expression lighting up his face.
"You better hope Drei doesn't know that," he laughed to hide his slight flustering, imagining the face their friend would make should he find out. Which honestly only made him want to laugh harder though he restrained himself, his smile narrowing into a pointed smirk. "And why? You curious?" he teased in response to her original question, jokingly raising an eyebrow in an added gesture that matched his tone.
Yet the laughter soon eased into a gentle silence as she began working the cloth against his damaged skin again, and as he concentrated on each careful touch her hands made as she moved, he found his mind wandering. And gradually an honest expression formed on his face, the soft smile on his lips slowly fading away as he parted them to speak.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it before," Alex whispered quietly... hesitantly, his voice barely audible as he blindly (and somewhat awkwardly) traced the palm of his hand as he tilted his head guiltily to the side. "My injury, that is. I should have. I know that... I think I knew that then too. I was just-"
He paused for a moment and held his breath, not wanting to admit the words out loud. Though despite it all, he knew he needed to... He trusted Misha. She deserved to know too. And he had to be honest, even if he felt ashamed admitting to it...
"What happened back in that room - when I was tortured - was worse than anything I've ever experienced," he began to whisper quietly, his voice shaking a little at the memory. "I couldn't see anything, I didn't know what was going on. All I could hear were these horrible, agonizing screams... And then when Amanda poured that acid on me, I couldn't even think about anything else except the pain. It was like fire that just kept burning my eyes and my skin. A part of me wanted to die just so that it would stop hurting, but it didn't... I eventually passed out and when I woke up, I was blind and alone... I remember wondering if I was the only one that made it out..."
Taking a deep breath, Alex moved to speak again, his chest feeling heavy with emotion. Yet his voice remained calm, its sound echoing off the walls. "Copper was the one that eventually found me," he explained, the faintest hint of a smile appearing on the corners of his lips at the mention of the bloodhound. "He didn't seem fazed at all, just really excited to see me. It made me forget just how bad I must have looked. And then I ran into Nancy and well..." His smile immediately fell and he shook his head, biting his lower lip in hesitancy. "Let's just say, it wasn't the kind of welcome I expected. I still felt like me, even though I couldn't see anymore. But that...wasn't exactly what everyone else saw. Even Em..." He paused for a moment, the room growing silent as his frown deepened a little more. Gripping Misha's hand a little tighter, he could hear the screams his sister and Nancy had made at seeing him echo in his mind, and he lowered his head, attempting to keep his expression calm. He knew it was just a reaction and that they were shocked. They eventually had warmed up to him. And even then, he didn't exactly blame them either. Hell, he couldn't really say how he'd react if the roles were reversed, just that he knew he'd be shocked too. But it didn't make the pain he felt at realizing their terrified screams had been directed at him any less hurtful either. Even if he was confident in who he was...
It was just different when it came down to those closest to him.
Letting the ache in his chest subside, Alex slowly rose his head in the direction of Misha, his lips slowly parting to speak. "I didn't want to be seen for what happened to me," he admitted to her slowly in a somewhat more calmer tone than before, a small apologetic smile on his lips. "I didn't want someone I cared about to see the scars on my face and then think of me as someone different cause of it... And when you told me about Jamie, I didn't want to make things worse for you. But... I was scared too. I trust you. And I wanted to tell you. But... after Nancy and then Em...maybe-"
He trailed off, swallowing the rest of that sentence. He was unable to say it anyway due to the lump that had formed in his throat, but he didn't like saying it out loud again; he was too ashamed to. But more than that, he felt nervous - nervous for what exactly it was Misha might say... what she thought. He felt so fucking vulnerable in that moment, like his walls had been broken down from him confessing his fears. But he didn't feel uncomfortable even despite his nerves. Not with her anyway. "I just didn't want you to think differently of me," he finished quietly before closing his lips into a thin line, every note in his voice carrying hints of the various emotions swelling inside his chest: regret, worry, vulnerability... Each one of them released into the air as he waited apprehensively for whatever answer she may give.
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Post by Misha Charisse Quinn on Oct 1, 2018 9:52:51 GMT
She shook her head at Alex’ antics, a soft but exasperated smile on her lips. Poor baby was trying his best; it just so happened that his best looked like shit. More than getting rid of the dirt, he was spreading it all over his face and somehow managed to make things worse. Diligently, she did her best to fix this atrocity, giving her best friend an apologetic look that was of course lost on him as he protested about doing a fine job himself. She knew how difficult it must be for him to have to rely on somebody like this, when he was so used to being self-reliant and free, but the fact was that he needed help, and this place would demand enough of him as it was. She was already quite impressed with how well he’d been managing himself so far. Her boy was never one to give up. And yet, she couldn’t help but frown at his next words. "It did once. Was the worst pain I've ever felt in my life... physically anyway. But that was a while ago. I'm fine now. Remember?"She remained silent, her hands still working on his face. She’d wanted him to speak truthfully with her, yet having him admit to his suffering was… strange. Uncommon. Despite how close they were, he hated sharing his pain with others, even her… and of course, he felt the need to play it down like it was no big deal, when they both knew how untrue that was, and she felt a twinge in her heart. How exactly was she supposed to help support him if he never allowed her to even try? "You better hope Drei doesn't know that."
– Maybe I WANT him to know that. – She forced a smile as he continued joking.. Despite how much she tried, she didn’t really feel in the mood anymore, yet, at his next word, she managed to snicker. – What if I AM? For someone who likes to flirt with girls, you sure are secretive about them. Maybe I wanna know what floats your boat? – she teased, before forming a devilish smile. This was a little easier now. – Unless you’re secretly into guys. That would explain all the tension between you and Ryan. Did he “catch” your eye?She shook her head once more, her hair moving along as she reflected on herself. She kept feeling intermittently depressed and happy. She wasn’t sure if those mood swings were simply due to how exhausted she was about everything… or if it was because there were so many untold truths between her and Alex that she simply wasn’t sure how to feel about it, or how to enjoy their habitual fun.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it before," Alex’s shy whisper interrupted her thoughts, and she looked back up at him in wonder. Could he read her mind now? Wouldn’t be the strangest thing happening today. "My injury, that is. I should have. I know that... I think I knew that then too. I was just-" He continued, then interrupted himself once more. He seemed hesitant to tell her, almost…ashamed. And she had a feeling she knew why. He was trying to protect her from the truth again. Trying to carry the burden all by himself. Like always. Her free hand took his once more. – You just… what? – her question was gentle, but still firm. She had enough of beating around the bushes, and enough of being dotted on. Alex of all people should know she wasn’t a child and could take things upon her shoulders as well as he could. Sure, she’d torn up over Jamie’s death, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t be trusted to share his reality with him. Now more than ever, she needed him to understand that. – You can tell me. It’ll be okay, I promise.
She waited in silence for him to say something, anything, for her to understand him better, for her to know what to do. Just anything to work with. Anything. Then, Alex started speaking. Once they began flowing, the words wouldn’t stop; to the point Misha was starting to feel quite overwhelmed. Never had Alex reached out to her this deeply about his problems, and when she actually got to hear it…
The more he spoke, the more she found it difficult to breathe. She had wondered how this could have possibly happened, if he had suffered at all or had just woken up like that, but… to hear his voice filled with emotions shaking at the mere thought of it, retelling her all the pain he’d endured, how he’d even considered death, how lost he’d felt, how people, even his own sister, had reacted to his appearance… It made her feel… she didn’t even know how to describe how she felt. She wasn’t sure if she was shaking from anger, distress, emotion, or a mix of the three. And now he was looking at her with that apologetic smile, like he had done something wrong in speaking to her, like she cared if he hadn’t before. She wished he had, obviously. But she couldn’t blame him for speaking up now. Not with everything that had happened.
And yet…
"I just didn't want you to think differently of me."
The room remained quiet. Her hand was still in his. Whatever it was she expected him to end on… it wasn’t that. Without a word, she gawked at him, trying to make sense of his words. Did that imply that her best friend thought she would…?
Her grip on Alex’s hand accidentally grew tighter, and she quickly let go, as she lowered the hand still holding the towel from his forehead. So this is what this had been about, then. All this time, he’d been afraid of her opinion, of her reacting like the others had. And the truth was… she didn’t know what she would have done, had he told her about his state while they were still separated by a wall, with no way for her to do or say anything, with no way to even reach out for him, touch him, and comfort him; nothing but a wall to punch in frustration and hate while her closest friend suffered alone on the other side. But none of that mattered now. Her movements were slow and hesitant, like those of an untrained child; yet, step by step, she grew nearer to him, until he was close enough for her to wrap her arms clumsily around him. Somehow, this felt stranger than the hug they’d shared before; yet so much more needed, too; and so she squeezed him as tightly as she could, trapping him into her attempt at a comforting embrace.
– Alex… – her chin resting against her shoulder, her mouth opened, and closed again. Despite how little she fit in with the “popular kids” friendly antics, there were a few occasions when she wished she had their eloquence and knew how to express herself as well as they did. Sadly, she was still herself, and her poor excuses for communication skills would have to do. – I don’t care about that. I mean… – she shut her mouth once more. There she went. She needed to choose her words well. – Obviously I care. I wish it hadn’t happened. It shouldn’t have happened, and I’ll never not resent Amanda for it. Everything you went through… – her jaw tightened. Just thinking about it made her want to punch something, to hurt someone. Ever so quietly, her hands still on his shoulders, she moved back just enough to look up at him and stare into his vacant eyes, trying to gauge his expressions, moving about as nervously as she felt. – But that isn’t your fault. You didn’t ask for the scars, or to lose your sight. And it makes things harder for you – and for me – but… it doesn’t make you any less who you were. And I know you’re strong enough to pull through this. And I want to help you. Even if I’m going through something myself… I don’t want you to hide things that hurt you from me to protect me. And I don’t want you to be afraid of what I’ll think of you… – she lowered her gaze towards his chest. She was starting to feel her cheeks heating up. Simply saying this much was taking more effort out of her than she’d thought possible, but she needed to come through. – And no matter what it takes or how long it takes, it won’t change anything, alright? You’ll always be Alex to me. – her nervousness forced a quiet chuckle out of her. – Same idiot as always.
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Post by Alexander Attiyah on Oct 3, 2018 6:53:15 GMT
As Misha responded to his teasing comments, Alex could tell she wasn't quite as relaxed as before, her laughter more strained. And he could all but guess as to the reason why as he tried to lift her spirits up again, even just a tiny bit. And gradually he felt her hand that was still pressing the cloth against his forehead relax again, a more honest snicker reaching his ears as he smiled at her.
"What if I AM?" she replied teasingly, her words causing the ravenhaired to shoot her an amused look. "For someone who likes to flirt with girls, you sure are secretive about them. Maybe I wanna know what floats your boat?" She paused for a second, and despite the fact he couldn't see her face, he could instantly tell that her signature, mischievous grin was probably plastered on her face right now. "Unless you're secretly into guys," he heard her continue to jest, her playful comment earning herself a pointedly amused smirk in return. "That would explain all the tension between you and Ryan."
Shaking his head lightly as the cloth wandered across his skin, Alex's face formed into a mock scowl at the mention of their favorite asshole. He wished in that moment that he could roll his eyes better. Even more so at her follow-up question, the teasing tone in her voice cause him to let out a chuckle despite himself. "The only thing that guy can catch is a baseball," he replied with a sarcastic look, though not entirely meaning that statement as a joke. The asshole definitely was a walking anger management case with a doting mother complex. And he honestly didn't give a damn about that guy. As long as he behaved and stayed a hundred yards away from him or his friends, anyway.
However the brightness of the atmosphere didn't last long as he began apologizing, the words leaving his lips in an honest and extremely raw manner.
Following his confession, the room grew extremely quiet, neither of them saying anything. Alex immediately felt Misha's grip on his hand tighten before just as quickly vanishing altogether, the loss of her warm touch causing his nerves to elevate. He felt rather awkward; he definitely didn't talk about his feelings this openly or deeply with anyone - not even Em. And yet, even despite his nervousness (and obvious awkwardness), he didn't regret saying what he had. Nor did he wish he hadn't... He felt better, lighter - like all those words that had been weighing him down since that moment when he was tortured weren't quite as heavy as before. Though he couldn't help but worry as to what Misha was thinking as the cool texture of the cloth that was pressed against his forehead slowly lowered, only the sound of her gentle yet hesitated breaths breaking the silence that settled between the two of them. Maybe I said too much, he wondered as he remained in his spot leaning against the sink, his lips pressed into an anxiously thin line. He wished he knew what she was thinking in this moment... even more so being that he couldn't see her face and guess how she was feeling like he had been able to before.
Please say something, he whispered inwardly as he held his breath, waiting apprehensively for whatever answer the redhead would give. Yet instead of words, he was met with the faint and somewhat hesitant sound of her walking closer towards him, each step echoing off the walls. And he slowly rose his head in her direction, a somewhat surprised expression on his face.
"Misha, I-" he began to whisper in an quick attempt at an apology. Though he wasn't able to finish that thought as a pair of warm arms suddenly wrapped around him in a tight embrace, the unexpected and intimate gesture instantly causing his breath to catch in his throat. He could feel her warmth radiate against him as she leaned into him, her arms tightening with every breath she exhaled against his skin. And he felt his heart instantly skip a beat as his lips slowly parted, his muscles tensing up slightly on instinct by the surprising gesture. "Alex..." he heard her whisper in his ear as she rested her chin gently against his shoulder, the sound causing a lump to immediately form in his throat. Her voice as she breathed his name was so soft and sincere... though also somewhat strained - as if she was trying to find the words to say to him. And as if making up for that fact, he felt her arms tighten around him even more, pulling him closer towards her while nearly taking the air out of his lungs. Out of all the reactions he expected his best friend to have, he honestly hadn't been expecting such an openly personal one from her. He could tell by the way Misha's arms had clumsily wrapped around him that she was hesitant too... probably feeling as nervous as he was. This kind of intimate gesture still wasn't something either of them were used to, and definitely not at this kind of a level... Even despite having shared a few hugs in this hell together already. And it was probably one of the more awkward hugs they'd had so far... But it was different too. In a very new, very raw kind of way. It was the kind of hug that could only happen after sharing the deepest part of himself: his fears, his concerns, his experiences and guilt...
Focusing on her warmth as she held him close, Alex could tell it was similar for her as she continued to squeeze the air out of his lungs. It was as if she was trying to press every emotion--every word--she was attempting to communicate to him in that one simple yet heartfelt gesture. And gradually the ravenhaired's expression softened into a tender one as his arms slowly moved behind her, pulling her closer towards him while his own chest tightened in sync with her locked embrace. "I don't care about that," she assured him quietly as he held her close, only to quickly correct herself at her wordage. "I mean... obviously I care. I wish it hadn't happened. It shouldn't have happened, and I'll never not resent Amanda for it. Everything you went through..." She trailed off for a moment while the ravenhaired remained silent, his emotions swelling inside his chest at her words. He could feel each one hit him deeply, causing his heart to ache. He knew this was hard for her... same way that it was for him. She hadn't been the one to get hurt, but honestly, that didn't really matter. They had always been protective of each other and cared about the other, and much in the same way it pained and angered him greatly to think of someone hurting her, he knew that she was feeling those exact same emotions with Amanda injuring him. He could tell by the tone in her voice and the way her body tensed up inside his arms as she spoke, and his hold on her instinctively tightened into a gentle yet firm embrace as he focused on her breathing, wanting nothing more than to reassure her as well.
Letting out a slow breath, Alex felt Misha shift a little within his arms and he loosened his own hold on her slightly, allowing her to move back a little bit within his embrace. Without saying a word, the warmth of her hands through his shirt traveled until they now rested gently against his shoulders instead where her head once lay, her hair tickling his cheek before disappearing altogether. She was so close... He could tell from the way her breath lightly brushed against his face as she exhaled. And as he slowly adjusted his arms so that they were now resting against her sides, he could feel her staring directly at him now, the sensation causing his cheeks to heat up a little from the intimate distance. He felt so vulnerable in that moment... and so close to her. She continued to reassure him, each note he heard carrying a hint of nervousness in it - one that mirrored his own. Yet the more that she assured him, the more he found his emotions swelling and his chest growing heavier... his breath all but taken out of his lungs. Though this kind of heavy feeling was different than before. It wasn't unpleasant or uncomfortable at all, nor was it caused from his own anxiety or the weight of their situation or the fear that seemed to hang over their heads wherever they went. No. This time it was a deep warmth that was swelling within him - one that threatened to render him speechless as the lump in his throat grew from the sincere emotions he felt in that moment: emotions for the amount of trust she was letting him place in her; emotions for the comfort and strength she was giving him, and the help she was offering him... Emotions for her.
"Misha," Alex whispered quietly as she continued to reassure him, his forehead creasing into an openly touched expression. Despite his best attempt, he couldn't stop his own voice from hinting at the overwhelming feelings that swarmed his mind and his heart. Though the redhead didn't waver in what she had to say, her voice pausing for only a moment before she continued. "Even if I'm going through something myself... I don't want you to hide things that hurt you from me to protect me," Misha admitted in a gentle yet firm tone, her words causing the ravenhaired's eyes to immediately widen slightly in surprise as he closed his mouth in a thin, understanding line. He knew instantly what she was referring to, as well as the reasoning behind it. And she was right, even for as hard and different as it was for him to let people help him in his burdens... Especially when those burdens were weighed heavily with emotions he didn't like admitting to. But what really surprised him was that he wasn't sure he had ever heard someone so outrightedly tell him to let them help him before. It was... strange, in a way. And definitely unexpected. Most of the time people didn't really bother pressing him to tell them things. And most of the time, I'm a hell of a lot better at hiding them, he went on to add inwardly as he lowered his head slightly, letting out a slow and quiet breath. Yet for as new as it was, it made him feel warm too... and touched. And also a little guilty as well, for not trusting her earlier. Out of everyone, Misha was without a doubt the strongest person he had ever met; she always had been. And while he didn't like the thought of burdening her still, hearing her ask so openly and sincerely for him to put that trust in her too--the same trust that she put him--instantly rendered him speechless. Swallowing hard, Alex paused for a second before slowly nodding, his expression displaying his silent agreement to her. He could still feel her breath gently hitting against his cheek, letting him know how close she was. And subconsciously one of his hands resting against her side slowly rose, his fingertips tracing her hair up towards her face until he felt her skin brush ever so lightly against his hand... her touch causing his expression to soften a little. Though at her next words, he felt his frame instantly freeze, his hand stopping in its place just briefly resting against her cheek while his face shifted into a hopeful almost expectant look, as if he was trying to believe the words that were being echoed back to him over and over in his head.
"I don't want you to be afraid of what I'll think of you," Misha's voice echoed from a close distance, her sincere words pulling at his chest...each note helping to disperse his nerves more and more... "And no matter what it takes or how long it takes, it won't change anything, alright? You'll always be Alex to me. Same idiot as always."
She let out a quiet and slightly nervous chuckle following her teasing comment, the sound reverberating off the walls that surrounded them. Though Alex could barely register it as he stared blindly ahead at her, his lips parted slightly as a wave of relief washed over him. He had been so worried and so ashamed of the nagging thoughts that had crossed his mind ever since the harsh reality of his appearance had hit him so unexpectedly back in that computer lab... He couldn't know for sure how she would react or what she thought, and that thought had scared him... Standing in front of her now though as he held her close to him, he was faced with nothing but a deep trust and honesty that he wasn't sure he had ever really felt before. Misha had never screamed, never treated him like anything less than the Alex he was. Naya, Amanda, Miss Kishi... He was so confused about who to trust anymore; it left him feeling more unsure than he'd ever felt in his life. But despite everything, Misha was constantly there; she'd always been there and would always be there for him. The same way he'd be there for her... It left him with a warmth in his heart that seemed to extend towards every part of him, filled with a deep gratitude and relief that he couldn't even form into words no matter how hard he tried. Moving his lips, he attempted to say something--anything--to tell her how much her words meant to him; how deeply touched he felt... Yet no words came out. There just simply wasn't any way to audibly voice the overwhelming warmth and joy and relief and trust and love he felt towards her in that moment as she whispered those tender words to him. Each note seemed to pull him closer and closer towards her, his mouth becoming dryer while the quiet of the room settled around their two figures. Nothing but the sounds of their breaths filled the ravenhaired's ears as his hand rested tenderly against Misha's cheek, his thumb brushing lightly along her skin. He could feel her warmth seeping into his palm, mixing with the gentle heat coursing from his heart. It was like all those fears and worries he had instantly vanished in that one simple moment, his nerves alleviating along with the fading echo of the redhead's voice as his lips slowly turned upwards into an honest, overjoyed smile... the overwhelming mix of emotions and warmth instantly taking over... And before he even knew what was happening or fully realized what he was doing, Alex leaned in towards where he could feel Misha's breath hit faintly against his mouth, the space between the two of them closing in a split and passing second. And soon he felt that same warmth suddenly emanate on his lips in the form of a different heat: one he wasn't familiar with, yet immediately felt right all the same as his hand on her cheek kept her close, their lips no longer apart.
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Post by Misha Charisse Quinn on Oct 3, 2018 14:26:31 GMT
A myriad of emotions crossed through his face; starting from the most negatives, to end on a beautiful, joyful smile. She could see his feelings evolve with every one of her words, making her tense when he appeared worried or hurt and relax when he seemed more hopeful. She didn’t move away as his hand slowly made its way to her cheek, as she inwardly wondered if he was curious about her expressions. He could always read her so well… much better than she could read him. And now, he was at a disadvantage. At a moment such as this, she could only imagine how frustrated he must be. Yet, she could only smile as his features settled on an expression of pure delight. Her poor boy seemed almost overwhelmed with the situation, and she chuckled once again, this time in a more natural and pure way. Good. If she could reassure him a bit and make him feel better about himself… then she had done her job well.
She saw him struggle to get the words out, only a single whisper or her name managing to come through, and she grinned softly. She’d never thought she’d ever see the day when Alexander Attiyah was out of shit to say. This would be a date to mark on the calendar, if she’d had the smallest clue what day it was. Raising a hand to gently tap his cheek in a humorous way, she opened her mouth to let him know he didn’t have to say anything; she didn’t react as he suddenly grew closer to her, both of his arms holding her tight. She was used to him invading her personal space after all. And yet, she wasn’t ready for what was to come; and before she knew it, her freshly parted lips were covered with his own. For a moment her entire body froze, every brain cell in her mind refusing to function. Her hand remained still in the air as she vainly tried to make sense of what was happening. It was a kiss. Her honest to God best friend was kissing her.
Though the connection had just happened, it seemed to her like an eternity had passed by the time she realized what was going on. It was so confusing. And so sudden. And so…. Warm. This wasn’t her first kiss, yet she had never felt this warmth before; almost as if Alex’s body radiated heat and she could feel it flow from her lips throughout her entire body. It felt nice. And sweet. And comforting. And absolutely not like what kissing your best friend should feel like.
For the tiniest of seconds, she could feel her own lips pressing back, before her raised hand finally settled on his cheek, gently but firmly pushing him away and putting some distance between them. She deliberately chose to ignore the mild discontent she felt as the kiss broke, and lowered her hand on his chest to keep him at bay, her fingers brushing his shoulder. Her heart started beating fast, to the point it made it hard for her to breathe, as if it’d finally caught on. Meanwhile, she couldn’t stop staring at Alex’ face, trying to gauge his reaction. Her other hand rose to her mouth, the tip of her fingers lightly brushing against her wet lips.
– … … … I suppose that answers my earlier question. – she finally spoke in a low but intended whisper. If this had been her reply to what her personal fantasies were, she probably would have kept quiet too.
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Post by Alexander Attiyah on Oct 5, 2018 6:12:23 GMT
Alex's fingers gently brushed along Misha's skin as he focused on the heat that was seeping in from their combined lips, the sensation spreading throughout his entire frame in a single breath. The touch of her lips was dry and slightly off - like a bit of the skin was raised like a cut of some kind. Yet the ravenhaired didn't mind any of that. All he knew was how safe and right it felt... and how much he liked it. It was like her touch was filling him with a comforting warmth that immediately sent his heart racing, adding onto the swarm of overwhelming emotions still threatening to burst out of his chest. And he found himself automatically leaning in closer towards the source of that warmth, wanting to feel more of it...
Though almost as soon as it had begun, the reality of what he was doing and where he was suddenly hit him and his body froze immediately, the air in his lungs seeming to vanish in an instant.
Oh fuck!
Opening his eyes wide at the realization, Alex felt a hand press gently yet firmly against his cheek, and before he could react or move himself, he felt his head being pushed away, the soft and heated sensation of Misha's lips instantly leaving his own as he was forced to take a step back. His heart immediately skipped a beat in protest at the sudden loss of her warmth, and he couldn't help but be aware of a yearning desire to feel those emotions again swelling inside of him.
But he didn't have much time to reflect on that thought or how good it had felt as his mind froze, simply replaying the same sentence over and over again in his head: You kissed her. You literally just kissed her! He stood there bewildered, an openly shocked and embarrassed expression on his face. He could still feel the heat from the kiss... Still feel the soft and slightly chapped texture of Misha's lips on his, and the lingering sensation immediately caused his cheeks to burn in replacement of the warmth he had felt earlier while his emotions continued to swell inside him, making his chest tighten. He felt so confused. And extremely good. And also incredibly nervous and self-conscious - all at the same damn time. And as he felt the heat from her hand on his cheek shift down towards his chest, he couldn't help but swallow hard as his heart raced rapidly beneath his chest, merely inches away from where her he felt the heat from her fingers rest just below his shoulder through the fabric of his shirt. Focusing on the redhead's gentle touch, Alex vaguely wondered if she could sense how fast and loud his heart was beating right now beneath the palm of her hand. However he tried not to think about that as she continued to hold him at bay.Though that particular task didn't seem to be much of a problem to worry about as the ravenhaired's body was already frozen in place, his mind still trying to comprehend what he had just done. And how massively he had fucked up. Shit! "I, uh-" he attempted to apologize, his tone sounding as surprised and sheepish as he looked and felt. Yet that was as much as he was able to get out for now as absolutely no words came to his mind. This was definitely not something he had been expecting to do. Nor was it honestly how he wanted his feelings for her to be outed. And it definitely didn't seem like Misha had been expecting any of that either as he felt her hand on his chest tense up. "I suppose that answers my earlier question," he heard her whisper quietly, her voice low and sounding every bit as surprised as his own. He could feel her staring at him as she spoke, the tingling sensation of her gaze causing him to feel warm despite his shock. And at her pointed reference, he instantly felt his own nerves heighten as his blush gradually deepened, his mouth running dry.
"Yeah well, usually I'd prefer more red paint, but...that was nice," he attempted to joke in as light of a tone as he could manage. However he couldn't help his tone from going a little soft towards the end of his comment, his voice somewhat shy and nervous as he took a small step back and turned his head a little to the side. He didn't want Misha to see him blushing right now - especially after a telling comment like that. More than that, however, he was finding it harder to breathe being this close to her. It was like the space between them had become charged, and as he raised a hand up towards the back of his neck and rubbed it sheepishly, he couldn't help but become hyperly aware of where she was in relation to him. Every sound of her breath, every subtle noise as they moved... All of it was nagging at his mind in the same way his thoughts were now. Letting out a quiet breath, Alex bit the inside of his cheek, his head and chest feeling heavy. It was frustrating not being able to see Misha at all right now. It made it harder for him to get a read on what she was thinking - which in this particular case only made him more nervous. He wanted so badly for her to say something--anything right now... or at least be able to read her expressions to know what she was feeling like he used to.
Though at the same time, there was a large part of him that was glad he couldn't see her face right now. He wasn't sure if he would want to know what she was thinking... Mostly for the exact reason he didn't want to say anything about his feelings in the first place. And definitely not right after showcasing his emotions like that.
Not that I could even look at her face anyway, he went on to add inwardly as he bit the inside of his cheek, knowing for certain that he would be even more embarrassed and flustered if he did see her. Dammit!
"So uh- how's your lip?" he asked quietly as he attempted to change the subject to something else, only to immediately regret his choice of topic as soon as he said it. "I mean the cut...from when you tripped earlier." This was so damn awkward... "...Does it hurt?"
Yeah. Real fucking smooth.
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Post by Misha Charisse Quinn on Oct 5, 2018 14:52:37 GMT
At least he has the decency to look embarrassed.If she thought he was expressive before, it was nothing compared to what his face was going through right now. So many confused emotions came and went, from bliss to shock to absolute shame as he struggled to speak. It almost looked like Alex was… even more surprised than she was. As if… As if he hadn’t expected to do this at all. The thought tugged her heart, but she had to put it aside as soon as Alex’s mouth opened anew. "Yeah well, usually I'd prefer more red paint, but...that was nice."“Nice”. Her best friend just went, embraced her, kissed her out of nowhere, and said it was “nice”. – Right. – she coldly replied. That choice of word, added to the boy’s surprise when he had been the one to start it, wasn’t exactly pleasing her. And now, he was blushing, and to her dismay, the sight automatically caused her own cheeks to heat up. It was as if her body was taking in the situation one part at a time, and it only made it more draining. He kissed you. He literally just kissed you.What… was she supposed to do about that…?
She could still feel the heat on her lips spreading to her hand, the tingling sensation on her cheeks where his fingers had caressed her seconds ago; as well as the unfamiliar warmth which had spread throughout her body, slowly fading. She wondered how he’d felt. Had this just been an “in the heat of the moment” decision, something he’d done without thinking and without MEANING it? Was this why he seemed so confused? Had he just been too emotional to think things through or… was there more to this? She didn’t know, and the uncertainty was what was getting to her the most. She didn’t know how she was supposed to act if he’d done it out of genuine interest… nor if it had been completely random. Nor did she know which of the two options were more hurtful. She looked down. What could she even do or say right now? This was her best friend. She couldn’t be mad at him. She cherished him. And she needed him, now more than ever. So what…? "So uh- how's your lip?" the question immediately had her look back up at him. Seriously, THIS was what he’d decided to talk about? "I mean the cut...from when you tripped earlier. Does it hurt?"She quirked an eyebrow in surprise, one of her fingers running over said injury. She had told him about her fall, but she hadn’t mentioned getting a cut. So how did he… Her eyes grew wide. He’d FELT it. With his lips. She resisted the urge to facepalm or shove him backwards. Gosh, this was embarrassing. – It’s fine. – she reacted quickly, the words spurring out of her mouth. The least she had to speak about this the better. – It doesn’t hurt. – she sighed – Alex, you…
She cut herself short. This wouldn’t do. She could feel the awkwardness surrounding her. It was oozing out of Alex’s poor confused body, and enveloped her whole as well. This wasn’t their thing. They were always confident and true to each other. They were at their best together. Counted on each other. They didn’t ineptly stand around like this making small talk. This just… wasn’t them. And now… – I’m not angry. – though the sentence came out promptly, its enunciation was slow, deliberate. If she wanted to get anywhere with him, she needed to fix this somehow. And, in a way… she wasn’t lying. She was a little weirded out, partially from his actions and in part from her own feelings, but she wasn’t mad. Even though she felt like she should have been furious at him for this, she just… wasn’t. That had to count for something.
– But I am… very puzzled. – she continued. She hated how shy and weak she sounded, but alas… this was so out of her comfort zone, she had nothing to stand on or to guide herself by. She just had… nothing. And considering his state, she wasn’t sure he could give her much more to work with. Her eyes darted around the room, looking for something to distract herself with. Even though he couldn’t stare back at her, just seeing all of her perplexity reflected in his features made it hard for her to look at him.
[OOC: Misha made a perception check]
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Post by Administrator on Oct 6, 2018 12:24:15 GMT
Dice result: 1D10 => 4 Failure; you didn't find anything useful.
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Post by Alexander Attiyah on Oct 7, 2018 22:06:44 GMT
"It's fine," Misha replied to him quickly, causing Alex's lips to form into a thin line. She definitely didn't sound thrilled at all with the situation, which... felt more like an understatement than anything right now. Though it wasn't something he blamed her for or could blame her for. "It doesn't hurt."
At her words, he gave her a small smile, forcing himself through his own embarrassment. "I'm glad," he replied back honestly, though in a hushed and rather sheepish tone. He really was relieved he didn't hurt her or anything... but despite being blind in everything else, he wasn't blind to the cold way she had spoke earlier after his attempt at a joke and the tense way she sounded now. And all together with everything else, it left him feeling entirely unsure what to do or say in this moment - for once in his life.
Listening quietly as Misha let out a breath, Alex turned his head away the second she spoke, almost bracing himself for what she'd say next as she quickly spoke his name. "Alex, you..."
Fucked up? he inwardly answered her as Misha's voice cut off towards the end, keeping his head turned in the opposite direction from where she was as he retained a sigh himself. This wasn't what he wanted. He didn't want her being awkward around him or him to be awkward around her - especially since they were always so comfortable around each other. It just felt... wrong.
And yet he couldn't prevent his own awkwardness in that moment or his embarrassment at showing his feelings for her so unexpectedly and forward like that. Even more so when he knew how she felt about boundaries and how he always respected her in that regard.
He had kissed her. Him, her best friend, had kissed her. And now they both had to deal with it.
Fuck...
Remaining silent as their breaths echo in the deadened space, Alex could still feel his body reacting to the warmth it had felt, his lips still tingling slightly while his heart inside his chest started to slow down. He could have sworn he had felt Misha kiss him back - right before she had pushed him away. The touch was so faint... barely recognizable. And it had only lasted about a fraction of a second. But yet the feeling he had when it had happened didn't want to leave his mind. He felt so sure that it happened... But in all honesty, he also wondered if it hadn't happened at the same time.
Maybe I just want to believe that? he whispered in his mind as doubt nagged at his brain, biting the inside of his cheek in hesitation and confusion. She had broke the kiss right before that... Maybe she just shifted closer when she went to push me back?
He let out a hushed sigh and continued to keep his head turned away, hiding the uncertainty and nerves he felt as to what the answer to that question could be exhibited on his face. He had definitely felt something during that kiss. He had felt a lot of things actually... If anything, it had only confirmed what he was feeling - what he had been trying to deny for a while. And right now, he wanted so desperately to know what was going on inside Misha's head. Did she feel any of that too?
Judging by the only thing he could be aware of right now--that being Misha's voice and the unbelievably uncomfortable atmosphere--his best friend wasn't happy with him. And deservedly so on his part. She sounded surprised, confused, uncomfortable... essentially as awkward as he was right now. And none of that helped in calming his nerves or the fear that he might have jeopardized their friendship even in a small part, despite his sad attempts at easing those worries. He didn't want to hurt her, didn't want to overstep boundaries, but...
He frowned. He didn't like this. He wanted to be able to say something that would help her feel better. Yet standing where he was with the sense of her eyes currently staring at him, he couldn't help but worry that their kiss (however right it had felt and however honest it was) had just put a giant barrier between the two of them.
And a very awkward barrier at that.
"I'm not angry," Misha's voice cut into the silence as the ravenhaired remained silent, his frown deepening for a second at her pointed choice of words. "But I am... very puzzled."
Swallowing hard at the shy tone in her voice, Alex slowly nodded in understanding. "I know," he replied simply as his cheeks burned, his voice sheepish and barely audible due to how dry his mouth was. He knew she was confused, and probably deserved some kind of answer more than the one he'd given her. But he couldn't really answer her. And in a big way, he honestly didn't want to; he wasn't ready to confess how he felt out loud... And he really didn't want to risk saying something stupid like that lip comment again. Making her even more uncomfortable or drawing more attention to his feelings than he'd already had was the last thing he wanted to do.
But more than all of that, now wasn't the time. They needed to focus on getting out of this place, and confessing his feelings wasn't going to help with that - regardless of if he felt ready or not. Not that I could say anything anyway, he inwardly added as the heat in his face burned. No, right now they needed to stick together and make it back to the others. Before that fucking murderer wearing our classmates as skins does.
"Look, I uh... I think we should be getting back to the others," Alex suggested slowly as he rubbed the back of his neck, feeling how the wet parts of his hair tickled his skin occasionally. "Drei and Peyton are probably locked in a staring contest right about now." He let a quiet and somewhat nervous chuckle escape his lips at the thought as he lowered his hand slightly, picturing the two said names having their own awkward conversation--or attempt at one, if he could guess. Though he hoped it wasn't nearly as awkward as the one he was in now as he took a single step away from the sink, his head turning back in the direction of Misha's voice.
"But thanks. You know... For the help," he continued to whisper to her yet in a softer tone, gesturing with the same hand towards his forehead where she had been tending to his cut. His words were quiet, yet they were honest; he really did appreciate her help. Even if it wasn't exactly something he would have wanted to need help with. And he still wanted her to know that... Even if he wasn't able to answer anything else.
He didn't want this wall between them to keep them apart.
Giving a small smile in her general direction, Alex could still feel his nerves nagging at his mind as he made an effort to brighten the mood again, his tone tilting into a slightly more teasing one despite the emotions still swirling around inside of him. "So what's the diagnosis, doc?" he asked, hearing his own embarrassment still faintly hinted at in his voice. "Think my war paint is looking better now or what?"
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